World’s Best Fart Contest in Surat flops after participants fail to pass wind
In what could only be described as a gut-wrenching disappointment, Gujarat’s first-ever “World’s Best Fart Championship” in Surat ended with more whimpers than explosions Sunday.
The event, hyped as a groundbreaking celebration of flatulence, saw just three brave souls attempt—and fail—to clinch trophies for the “longest,” “loudest,” and “most musical” farts.
Let’s face it: even the boldest among us might struggle to cut the cheese on command in front of a live audience.
The Big Letdown
Organizer Yatin Sangoi had high hopes, with 60 people initially registered to showcase their windy talents at a banquet hall in Surat’s upscale Vesu area.
But by showtime, only 20 participants showed up, and just three—Sushil Jain, Alkesh Pandya, and Vishnu Heda—mustered the courage to step onstage.
Spoiler alert: None delivered. “They froze under pressure,” Sangoi admitted, citing the intimidating presence of 70 spectators, photographers, and news crews. “Even our high-tech fart-measuring device couldn’t save the day.”
Stage Fright Meets Social Awkwardness
Imagine this: You’re in a room full of strangers, cameras rolling, waiting for you to… let it rip.
Talk about performance anxiety! Sangoi’s team had partnered with a tech firm to build a specialized gadget to analyze duration, decibel levels, and even “musicality” of farts.
But the trio of “fartists” choked, leaving trophies unclaimed. Attendees instead received consolation gift hampers—a small reward for their dashed dreams.
Blame It on the Spotlight
“People were shy. The media attention backfired,” Sangoi said, acknowledging the awkward reality of public flatulence.
Social norms, it seems, proved stronger than the lure of glory.
After all, farting is usually a private affair—or at least meant to be discreet.
“You can’t force nature,” shrugged one attendee, who asked not to be named. “It’s like asking someone to sneeze on cue.”
Mumbai, You’re Next!
Undaunted, Sangoi is already plotting a comeback. His next stop? Mumbai, with a revamped setup featuring private “fart chambers” to ease stage fright.
“No audience glare, just pure focus,” he promised. Whether this strategy will unleash a symphony of successful toots remains to be heard.
Meanwhile, Surat’s trio of would-be champions have earned a dubious place in history. Jain, Pandya, and Heda—forever memorialized as the ones who almost blew it.
